"Other Halves" (Fear of Falling, 1986)
Jul. 10th, 2008 10:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
riptide_asylumTitle: Other Halves
Rating/Category: R
Summary: A dawn run heralds the start of more than a new day.
Other Halves
Nick woke at dawn and felt Cody's absence even before his eyes told him the opposite bunk was empty. 'Fuck.' He sat up and swung his feet to the floor, staring at the undisturbed bed as though it could divulge his partner's location. 'Wherever he is, I hope to God he's okay.'
Fighting with Cody always tore him up and this hadn't been an easy week. Nick ranked the last five days right up there with his dad walking out and his mom dying.
Not that he and Cody were fighting. You couldn't even call it a disagreement. It was - Nick dropped his head in his hands. It was something he had to figure out how to handle, was what it was. And he'd better figure it out fast, because he couldn't take the tension between them for another day.
Cody had been too quiet the last couple of weeks, and Nick had known something was eating him. He'd waited for the whisper in the dark that meant Cody was ready to talk, but the nights passed and Cody just got quieter. Nick started to worry, and on Monday morning he'd pushed the issue finally.
"Nick, I'm really sorry, but I'm in love with you and I need you to know it." It was the last thing he'd expected to hear and he hadn't been able to answer. He'd dropped onto his bunk, staring at Cody with his mouth open, and hadn't moved to stop him when he hurried out of their room. By the time Nick had pulled himself together and gone after him, Cody had disappeared off the boat.
Nick was still looking for a way to answer Cody. They'd hardly spoken all week and it hurt. It hurt bad, walking on eggshells, trying to pretend everything was fine, that they weren't both avoiding the same topic. The elephant in the corner could've sunk the damn boat.
Knowing he had no chance of getting any more sleep, Nick got out of bed. He pulled on a pair of shorts and reached for his running shoes with a sigh. Might as well go out for a run. See if physical activity cleared his head any.
Out on the pier, he looked around. It was still pretty dark down here on the ground and Nick looked up at the lightening sky. Cargo work. That was where he'd done most of his dawn flying. He'd flown into the sunrise more times than he cared to count, and yeah, it was pretty. It also hurt your eyes, that angle the sun got as it crept past the mountains. He lifted his arms over his head, stretching. Those two years - man, that had been a lonely, screwed up time.
Nick started out down the pier, running easily. A light breeze, cool but not cold, touched his skin as he jogged past the Jimmy in its parking spot. 'Where the hell is Cody, anyway?' He frowned. Staying out all night wasn't Cody's style. And his car was still here. It didn't make sense. None of this fucking mess made any sense. And if he didn't get his head around it, fast, it might cost him his best friend.
'I won't let that happen.' Nick shook his head determinedly. This week had been bad enough. He missed Cody next to him, missed Cody's arm around him, and more than that, he missed the way that Cody always knew what he was thinking.
He missed the way he always knew what Cody was thinking, too. Nick gave a short, mirthless laugh, shaking his head. 'I didn't know this, though, did I?'
Didn't know, or didn't want to know? The thought took him by surprise and he broke his stride, slowing to a walk. He loved Cody, that wasn't something he'd ever felt the need to question or to look at too closely, and Cody loved him back. Nick knew it, felt it and it felt damned good. He'd never thought more about it than that.
Now that he was thinking about it, he had known. He just hadn't... hadn't understood. More to the point, he'd chosen not to understand what else Cody felt for him. 'Why? Because I don't feel that way about him?' Nick asked himself as he dropped down the steps to the beach. 'What the hell way is that, anyhow?' He shook his head. 'I love the guy, I know that much. And nothing can change that.' He started to run again, welcoming the harder work of running in the sand.
A gull scraaked at him and flew away, making a lazy circle then heading out to sea. Nick followed it with his eyes. What was that dumb book Cody bought him when he first moved aboard the Riptide? Jonathan Seagull? Jonathan Livingston Seagull, that was it. Cody had been so excited about the damned thing - Look, Nick, it's about the joy of flight, and y'know, there's some great stuff in it, buddy. A seagull doing aerobatics? He'd never figured out what Cody thought was great about that.
Nick slowed his pace to a jog.
Maybe that was just another thing he hadn't understood about Cody Allen. Now there was a depressing thought. After the years they'd spent together, damned hard years a lot of them, he was used to thinking of Cody as pretty much a part of him. "My other half," he muttered under his breath. And all this time Cody had been looking at him and thinking - 'Thinking what?' Nick asked himself. 'When I look at him, what the hell do I think, anyhow?' He pictured Cody in the hospital after the fuck-up with Sheila. The only thought he'd had was how much he loved Cody, and how he'd do anything - anything! - to stop him hurting.
That was only natural. Looking out for each other was second nature. Stood to reason, after some of the shit they'd seen. Sticking together was the only damned thing that had made any sense, the one thing they'd both got right in the end.
He and Cody had been through hell together and come out the other side, and when they went their separate ways they'd both found out, soon enough, that life alone was a cold and fucked-up place. Together, though - Nick still remembered the warm feeling in his chest the day he'd stood on the Riptide for the first time, Cody's arm around him, listening to Cody tell him what a goldmine the tourist business was gonna be. Being with Cody again had filled the empty, hollow ache he'd been living with, and he hadn't needed any persuading. From there, they'd built their life on the boat - the tours, the detective agency, all of it they'd done together.
And this last week, the two of them bouncing off each other like bumper-cars, each encounter more bruising than the last - Nick would do anything to move past that, to get back to the place where he and Cody were two parts of the same whole.
Nick picked up the pace again, carving out a straight line in the sand between the soft, foamy breakers on one side and the ice-plant-covered dunes on the other. It was still too early for most of the harbor to do more than discover a hangover from the night before, but lights were coming on in one or two of the shops that sat back from the beach, squatting next to the highway. The yeasty smell of baking wafted out of the taqueria he and Cody ate at more days than not, and when the fish market rolled up its heavy metal door, the smell of that day's catch nearly bowled Nick into the ocean. He picked up the pace, calves burning, lungs hard against the sea air. Maybe he'd pick up calamari for stir-fry tonight; even though the thought of all those tentacles gave him the creeps, Cody loved the stuff.
Cody. Everything led back to Cody - all Nick's thoughts, his days, his dreams, they all seemed perpetually intertwined with the guy.
'Isn't that what love's supposed to be like?'
The thought knocked Nick for such a loop he nearly wiped out over a clump of beached seaweed, right onto the sand.
How would he know what love was supposed to be like? His whole adult life had been an endless procession of short-term girls, all of them into and out of his life in the time it took to change the sheets. The one constant all this time had been Cody. Always Cody.
He shook himself, wondering again where his partner had spent the night, and nearly missed seeing the scrap of blanket peeking out from behind the craggy rocks, well back from where the tide came in.
He ran past, then turned with a jolt. The blanket, which at first glance seemed a haphazard pile on the sand, had two feet sticking out of it. His natural inclination to help came rushing to the forefront. He ran up the beach and dropped to his knees next to the prone figure. "Hey! Hey buddy! You okay?" Nick reached for where he could see a shoulder peeking out the top of the brightly colored wool covering. "Hey buddy - "
Cody sat up suddenly, blinking in confusion in the early morning light. Nick rocked back on his heels in shock. "Cody..."
The two of them sat and stared at each other. A seagull flew overhead, describing a great spiral with its flight before coming to rest on the rocks above them, hungrily pecking some luckless creature out of a crevice.
Cody scooted back to lean against the rocks, putting more space between the two of them. Nick felt a wave of sick anxiety sweep through him. What he wanted more than anything right now was to curl up next to Cody, their shoulders touching, the physical closeness a mere shadow of what they meant to each other. Instead he dropped to the cool, silky sand.
"Cody, man, have you been out here all night?" Nick asked worriedly. God, how could he have let this get to the point where his best friend would rather spend a cold, lonely night on the beach than share his cabin?
Cody glanced at him then away, looking out to sea. "Most of it, I guess. I wasn't tired so I came out for a walk and didn't feel like going back."
Nick looked at the blanket. "Right. You went for a walk with a blanket?" He swallowed hard. "Cody, this is all my fault. I'm sorry, man."
"Your fault?" Cody looked back at him. "Nick, it's me causing all the problems."
"You haven't done anything wrong." Nick moved closer to Cody. "Buddy, all you did was tell me how you felt. I'm the asshole who didn't say anything, didn't talk about it for the next five days." He met Cody's eyes. "Cody, it wasn't because I didn't want to talk about it, okay? It's just that - I didn't know what to say and I was scared that if I said the wrong thing I'd screw everything up. I still don't know what to say. But it's pretty obvious that saying nothing isn't working, huh?"
Cody tried a small smile. "Nick, are you serious? You still want to work together?"
"Cody." Nick closed the distance between them and came to rest next to his partner, feeling the rocks cut into his back through the thin t-shirt. He looked at Cody. "That doesn't even begin to cover it. Of course I still want to work with you. And live with you, hang out with you, play volleyball, surf, everything we've always done. Man, this week - it's been sheer hell, you know? Not having you around. I keep turning around to tell you things and when you're not there it hurts. You know?"
Cody nodded, and Nick noticed he was shivering. "Buddy, you're freezing," he said, and grabbed the blanket. "Put this damned thing around you, seeing how you brought it all the way out here."
Cody sat forward, letting Nick drape the blanket over his shoulders. "Thanks, pal," he muttered. He wrapped the ends tightly around himself, arms crossed across his torso, rocking to warm up. Nick slid an arm around his back and rubbed energetically, watching his friend with concern. Cody remained quiet, staring off into the morning.
Nick sighed. "Cody, I've really fucked this up, huh? Listen, man. You're the best friend I've ever had. I can't lose you."
Cody turned and looked at him. "Nick, I think - a while ago I realized that what I feel for you, what we have together, that's more than just... it's not like...'
Nick took the plunge. "You're in love with me."
"Yeah. I think I am. There's no one else I wanna be with." Cody looked intently at Nick's face, and Nick couldn't remember the last time he'd seen him look so scared, so vulnerable. "What we have, I don't think many people get a shot at that. You and I, Nick... when I'm with you, it's better than anything I can imagine."
Nick thought for a second. "Cody, I don't know how to put this exactly, but I didn't know I was your type." He looked nervously at his partner.
"Yeah, tell me about it. You look like hell in a bikini," Cody answered. They both cracked up.
"No seriously, come on," Nick said after a second. "What about Sheila?"
Cody looked at the sand. "Nick, I can't explain it. What I feel for you is different than what went on between Sheila and me. She's a beautiful woman, and I had feelings for her. But when I'm with you - Nick, when you touch me, it's completely different. I want you on a whole different level. There's something inside me that wants to touch you back. But it's not the same. Buddy, I've never felt what I feel for you about anyone, Nick. Not ever. It's terrifying."
After a second, Nick said, "You really think that we could... be together? You and me?"
"Yeah." Cody said, his voice shaking. "I just can't imagine a life without you, Nick. And when you touch me..." Cody went back to staring at the dunes. "I just know, okay? And now I'm scared as hell you'll know I'm the last thing you want."
Nick looked at his best friend.
Cody met his eyes then returned his gaze to the sand. "When you were seeing Peggy, pal, I... I did a lot of thinking. I hated what you went through, seeing you hurt, hurting for her, but it made me realize how much I feel for you. And I've been trying to work up the nerve to tell you before the next Peggy comes along and breaks your heart."
"Nick, I love you. It kills me to see you get your heart broken," Cody added in a whisper.
Nick continued to rub Cody's back. The two of them sat in silence as the sun crept over the mountains, gradually adding detail to the deserted beach. Nick forced himself to speak. "Cody, you're the best damn thing that's ever happened to me. I love you man, I know that much, and maybe we are in love after all. And the rest... we just haven't gotten around to yet."
They stared at each other, Nick's hand gradually slowing on Cody's back. He noticed that Cody had stopped shivering. Very slowly, Nick leaned in closer and Cody did likewise. Their lips touched, softly at first, and the first thing Nick noticed was the insistent bristling of Cody's mustache. The sensation was unexpected but not unpleasant, and then Nick felt the tentative softness of Cody's lips against his own.
All of which was suddenly eclipsed by one overriding thought: this was good. Nick felt like he'd been hit by lightning. Every part of his body tingled, and he wouldn't have been surprised to see the dune in front of them burst into flames. He felt warm and connected, safe and right. And incredibly turned on.
When their lips parted, they stayed huddled together, the echo of the surf against the rocks behind their heads dominating all sounds.
"Okay?" Nick asked. Cody relaxed into him, his expression turning to relief. Nick grinned, pulling Cody closer.
Cody shifted, putting his arm around Nick's back and stretching the blanket around them both. "Is this weird for you?" he asked.
Nick thought about it. "No Cody, it's not. It feels..." There were no words adequate for how he felt right now, in Cody's arms, having just learned that what he had called the best friendship of his life was not only reciprocated but had somehow become magnified in the last five minutes. He wondered if they really might have been in love for years without knowing it. Feeling brave, Nick kissed Cody's temple softly. "Pal, it feels right."
Rating/Category: R
Summary: A dawn run heralds the start of more than a new day.
Other Halves
Nick woke at dawn and felt Cody's absence even before his eyes told him the opposite bunk was empty. 'Fuck.' He sat up and swung his feet to the floor, staring at the undisturbed bed as though it could divulge his partner's location. 'Wherever he is, I hope to God he's okay.'
Fighting with Cody always tore him up and this hadn't been an easy week. Nick ranked the last five days right up there with his dad walking out and his mom dying.
Not that he and Cody were fighting. You couldn't even call it a disagreement. It was - Nick dropped his head in his hands. It was something he had to figure out how to handle, was what it was. And he'd better figure it out fast, because he couldn't take the tension between them for another day.
Cody had been too quiet the last couple of weeks, and Nick had known something was eating him. He'd waited for the whisper in the dark that meant Cody was ready to talk, but the nights passed and Cody just got quieter. Nick started to worry, and on Monday morning he'd pushed the issue finally.
"Nick, I'm really sorry, but I'm in love with you and I need you to know it." It was the last thing he'd expected to hear and he hadn't been able to answer. He'd dropped onto his bunk, staring at Cody with his mouth open, and hadn't moved to stop him when he hurried out of their room. By the time Nick had pulled himself together and gone after him, Cody had disappeared off the boat.
Nick was still looking for a way to answer Cody. They'd hardly spoken all week and it hurt. It hurt bad, walking on eggshells, trying to pretend everything was fine, that they weren't both avoiding the same topic. The elephant in the corner could've sunk the damn boat.
Knowing he had no chance of getting any more sleep, Nick got out of bed. He pulled on a pair of shorts and reached for his running shoes with a sigh. Might as well go out for a run. See if physical activity cleared his head any.
Out on the pier, he looked around. It was still pretty dark down here on the ground and Nick looked up at the lightening sky. Cargo work. That was where he'd done most of his dawn flying. He'd flown into the sunrise more times than he cared to count, and yeah, it was pretty. It also hurt your eyes, that angle the sun got as it crept past the mountains. He lifted his arms over his head, stretching. Those two years - man, that had been a lonely, screwed up time.
Nick started out down the pier, running easily. A light breeze, cool but not cold, touched his skin as he jogged past the Jimmy in its parking spot. 'Where the hell is Cody, anyway?' He frowned. Staying out all night wasn't Cody's style. And his car was still here. It didn't make sense. None of this fucking mess made any sense. And if he didn't get his head around it, fast, it might cost him his best friend.
'I won't let that happen.' Nick shook his head determinedly. This week had been bad enough. He missed Cody next to him, missed Cody's arm around him, and more than that, he missed the way that Cody always knew what he was thinking.
He missed the way he always knew what Cody was thinking, too. Nick gave a short, mirthless laugh, shaking his head. 'I didn't know this, though, did I?'
Didn't know, or didn't want to know? The thought took him by surprise and he broke his stride, slowing to a walk. He loved Cody, that wasn't something he'd ever felt the need to question or to look at too closely, and Cody loved him back. Nick knew it, felt it and it felt damned good. He'd never thought more about it than that.
Now that he was thinking about it, he had known. He just hadn't... hadn't understood. More to the point, he'd chosen not to understand what else Cody felt for him. 'Why? Because I don't feel that way about him?' Nick asked himself as he dropped down the steps to the beach. 'What the hell way is that, anyhow?' He shook his head. 'I love the guy, I know that much. And nothing can change that.' He started to run again, welcoming the harder work of running in the sand.
A gull scraaked at him and flew away, making a lazy circle then heading out to sea. Nick followed it with his eyes. What was that dumb book Cody bought him when he first moved aboard the Riptide? Jonathan Seagull? Jonathan Livingston Seagull, that was it. Cody had been so excited about the damned thing - Look, Nick, it's about the joy of flight, and y'know, there's some great stuff in it, buddy. A seagull doing aerobatics? He'd never figured out what Cody thought was great about that.
Nick slowed his pace to a jog.
Maybe that was just another thing he hadn't understood about Cody Allen. Now there was a depressing thought. After the years they'd spent together, damned hard years a lot of them, he was used to thinking of Cody as pretty much a part of him. "My other half," he muttered under his breath. And all this time Cody had been looking at him and thinking - 'Thinking what?' Nick asked himself. 'When I look at him, what the hell do I think, anyhow?' He pictured Cody in the hospital after the fuck-up with Sheila. The only thought he'd had was how much he loved Cody, and how he'd do anything - anything! - to stop him hurting.
That was only natural. Looking out for each other was second nature. Stood to reason, after some of the shit they'd seen. Sticking together was the only damned thing that had made any sense, the one thing they'd both got right in the end.
He and Cody had been through hell together and come out the other side, and when they went their separate ways they'd both found out, soon enough, that life alone was a cold and fucked-up place. Together, though - Nick still remembered the warm feeling in his chest the day he'd stood on the Riptide for the first time, Cody's arm around him, listening to Cody tell him what a goldmine the tourist business was gonna be. Being with Cody again had filled the empty, hollow ache he'd been living with, and he hadn't needed any persuading. From there, they'd built their life on the boat - the tours, the detective agency, all of it they'd done together.
And this last week, the two of them bouncing off each other like bumper-cars, each encounter more bruising than the last - Nick would do anything to move past that, to get back to the place where he and Cody were two parts of the same whole.
Nick picked up the pace again, carving out a straight line in the sand between the soft, foamy breakers on one side and the ice-plant-covered dunes on the other. It was still too early for most of the harbor to do more than discover a hangover from the night before, but lights were coming on in one or two of the shops that sat back from the beach, squatting next to the highway. The yeasty smell of baking wafted out of the taqueria he and Cody ate at more days than not, and when the fish market rolled up its heavy metal door, the smell of that day's catch nearly bowled Nick into the ocean. He picked up the pace, calves burning, lungs hard against the sea air. Maybe he'd pick up calamari for stir-fry tonight; even though the thought of all those tentacles gave him the creeps, Cody loved the stuff.
Cody. Everything led back to Cody - all Nick's thoughts, his days, his dreams, they all seemed perpetually intertwined with the guy.
'Isn't that what love's supposed to be like?'
The thought knocked Nick for such a loop he nearly wiped out over a clump of beached seaweed, right onto the sand.
How would he know what love was supposed to be like? His whole adult life had been an endless procession of short-term girls, all of them into and out of his life in the time it took to change the sheets. The one constant all this time had been Cody. Always Cody.
He shook himself, wondering again where his partner had spent the night, and nearly missed seeing the scrap of blanket peeking out from behind the craggy rocks, well back from where the tide came in.
He ran past, then turned with a jolt. The blanket, which at first glance seemed a haphazard pile on the sand, had two feet sticking out of it. His natural inclination to help came rushing to the forefront. He ran up the beach and dropped to his knees next to the prone figure. "Hey! Hey buddy! You okay?" Nick reached for where he could see a shoulder peeking out the top of the brightly colored wool covering. "Hey buddy - "
Cody sat up suddenly, blinking in confusion in the early morning light. Nick rocked back on his heels in shock. "Cody..."
The two of them sat and stared at each other. A seagull flew overhead, describing a great spiral with its flight before coming to rest on the rocks above them, hungrily pecking some luckless creature out of a crevice.
Cody scooted back to lean against the rocks, putting more space between the two of them. Nick felt a wave of sick anxiety sweep through him. What he wanted more than anything right now was to curl up next to Cody, their shoulders touching, the physical closeness a mere shadow of what they meant to each other. Instead he dropped to the cool, silky sand.
"Cody, man, have you been out here all night?" Nick asked worriedly. God, how could he have let this get to the point where his best friend would rather spend a cold, lonely night on the beach than share his cabin?
Cody glanced at him then away, looking out to sea. "Most of it, I guess. I wasn't tired so I came out for a walk and didn't feel like going back."
Nick looked at the blanket. "Right. You went for a walk with a blanket?" He swallowed hard. "Cody, this is all my fault. I'm sorry, man."
"Your fault?" Cody looked back at him. "Nick, it's me causing all the problems."
"You haven't done anything wrong." Nick moved closer to Cody. "Buddy, all you did was tell me how you felt. I'm the asshole who didn't say anything, didn't talk about it for the next five days." He met Cody's eyes. "Cody, it wasn't because I didn't want to talk about it, okay? It's just that - I didn't know what to say and I was scared that if I said the wrong thing I'd screw everything up. I still don't know what to say. But it's pretty obvious that saying nothing isn't working, huh?"
Cody tried a small smile. "Nick, are you serious? You still want to work together?"
"Cody." Nick closed the distance between them and came to rest next to his partner, feeling the rocks cut into his back through the thin t-shirt. He looked at Cody. "That doesn't even begin to cover it. Of course I still want to work with you. And live with you, hang out with you, play volleyball, surf, everything we've always done. Man, this week - it's been sheer hell, you know? Not having you around. I keep turning around to tell you things and when you're not there it hurts. You know?"
Cody nodded, and Nick noticed he was shivering. "Buddy, you're freezing," he said, and grabbed the blanket. "Put this damned thing around you, seeing how you brought it all the way out here."
Cody sat forward, letting Nick drape the blanket over his shoulders. "Thanks, pal," he muttered. He wrapped the ends tightly around himself, arms crossed across his torso, rocking to warm up. Nick slid an arm around his back and rubbed energetically, watching his friend with concern. Cody remained quiet, staring off into the morning.
Nick sighed. "Cody, I've really fucked this up, huh? Listen, man. You're the best friend I've ever had. I can't lose you."
Cody turned and looked at him. "Nick, I think - a while ago I realized that what I feel for you, what we have together, that's more than just... it's not like...'
Nick took the plunge. "You're in love with me."
"Yeah. I think I am. There's no one else I wanna be with." Cody looked intently at Nick's face, and Nick couldn't remember the last time he'd seen him look so scared, so vulnerable. "What we have, I don't think many people get a shot at that. You and I, Nick... when I'm with you, it's better than anything I can imagine."
Nick thought for a second. "Cody, I don't know how to put this exactly, but I didn't know I was your type." He looked nervously at his partner.
"Yeah, tell me about it. You look like hell in a bikini," Cody answered. They both cracked up.
"No seriously, come on," Nick said after a second. "What about Sheila?"
Cody looked at the sand. "Nick, I can't explain it. What I feel for you is different than what went on between Sheila and me. She's a beautiful woman, and I had feelings for her. But when I'm with you - Nick, when you touch me, it's completely different. I want you on a whole different level. There's something inside me that wants to touch you back. But it's not the same. Buddy, I've never felt what I feel for you about anyone, Nick. Not ever. It's terrifying."
After a second, Nick said, "You really think that we could... be together? You and me?"
"Yeah." Cody said, his voice shaking. "I just can't imagine a life without you, Nick. And when you touch me..." Cody went back to staring at the dunes. "I just know, okay? And now I'm scared as hell you'll know I'm the last thing you want."
Nick looked at his best friend.
Cody met his eyes then returned his gaze to the sand. "When you were seeing Peggy, pal, I... I did a lot of thinking. I hated what you went through, seeing you hurt, hurting for her, but it made me realize how much I feel for you. And I've been trying to work up the nerve to tell you before the next Peggy comes along and breaks your heart."
"Nick, I love you. It kills me to see you get your heart broken," Cody added in a whisper.
Nick continued to rub Cody's back. The two of them sat in silence as the sun crept over the mountains, gradually adding detail to the deserted beach. Nick forced himself to speak. "Cody, you're the best damn thing that's ever happened to me. I love you man, I know that much, and maybe we are in love after all. And the rest... we just haven't gotten around to yet."
They stared at each other, Nick's hand gradually slowing on Cody's back. He noticed that Cody had stopped shivering. Very slowly, Nick leaned in closer and Cody did likewise. Their lips touched, softly at first, and the first thing Nick noticed was the insistent bristling of Cody's mustache. The sensation was unexpected but not unpleasant, and then Nick felt the tentative softness of Cody's lips against his own.
All of which was suddenly eclipsed by one overriding thought: this was good. Nick felt like he'd been hit by lightning. Every part of his body tingled, and he wouldn't have been surprised to see the dune in front of them burst into flames. He felt warm and connected, safe and right. And incredibly turned on.
When their lips parted, they stayed huddled together, the echo of the surf against the rocks behind their heads dominating all sounds.
"Okay?" Nick asked. Cody relaxed into him, his expression turning to relief. Nick grinned, pulling Cody closer.
Cody shifted, putting his arm around Nick's back and stretching the blanket around them both. "Is this weird for you?" he asked.
Nick thought about it. "No Cody, it's not. It feels..." There were no words adequate for how he felt right now, in Cody's arms, having just learned that what he had called the best friendship of his life was not only reciprocated but had somehow become magnified in the last five minutes. He wondered if they really might have been in love for years without knowing it. Feeling brave, Nick kissed Cody's temple softly. "Pal, it feels right."
