"Bikini Saturday" (Other, 1981)
Jul. 31st, 2015 11:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
riptide_asylumTitle: Bikini Saturday
Rating: NC17
Summary: Cody didn't know what to expect when he invited Nick to move in with him, but whatever it was, he knew it wouldn't be boring...
It was hot on the beach. A perfect California day -- just enough breeze to make the heat bearable, the tide at half mast with soft blue waves, perfect for swimming, the sand baked the exact temperature for proper sunbathing.
Cody was trying to work on his tan, but there were distractions. First were the advances of a couple of out-of-state co-eds, and second was Nick, flirting with three of Mama Jo's girls in the shallows.
That was nearly enough to make Cody throw caution to the winds and encourage the bustier of the two co-eds -- accent from somewhere in the south, a bright orange bikini and a satisfactorily round ass -- but his body wouldn't have a bar of it, even in fun.
No matter how she pranced and giggled, Cody's eyes slid away from her luscious curves and stuck on Nick's broad shoulders. She wanted to cheer him up -- all he felt was the quickening of his own heart as Nick moved closer to Bambi.
Flirt with her, he told himself sternly. It's cover, that's why Nick's doing it.
But it was no use. He looked back at Nick instead, and the jealousy he'd been studiously ignoring all morning clocked him hard in the solar plexus, stealing his breath and effectively killing even his brain's interest in Miss Southern Comfort.
"Excuse me," he said shortly, jumping to his feet, grabbing his towel, and striding away toward the pier. He could feel the eyes of the two co-eds on him all down the beach, but those other eyes, the ones he wanted on him -- Cody didn't allow himself to turn to check, but he was sure they'd stayed right on Bambi's tits the whole time.
Cody marched back to the boat, showered off the salt and moved to the foredeck to get on with his interrupted tanning, sans distractions.
But while the sun was certainly compliant, pouring all the rays he could wish his way, and the pier was suitably deserted (or what passed for deserted in early June), Cody found his tanning lotion too thin, his towel too bunched, the shadows all wrong, and the breeze from the wrong direction.
And, to top it all off, he'd been back on the boat at least a half hour, and Nick still hadn't appeared.
There it was, the thing that had chased him off the beach. Cody sat up on his bunchy towel, drew up his knees and rested his head down on them. Things were crazy, this thing was crazy, and if he didn't watch it, he'd soon be crazy too.
A week ago, he and Nick had ended up in bed. It wasn't exactly, technically, the first time, but it was the first time when they weren't in the jungle or hours from a suicide mission or both, and that had to count for something.
In fact, it must have counted for something, because instead of an intermittent string of desperate handjobs, this new technical first time had resolved itself into a week of two men in one bunk, silent, cautious, but consistent. Every night, and every night they did a little more.
But they hadn't talked about it, and they hadn't kissed.
And now there was the beach, and the bikinis, and Nick's flirty smile.
Cody had absolutely no idea how he was supposed to feel, but he was damn sure it wasn't jealous and heartbroken. And he had absolutely no idea what was supposed to happen next, how Saturday night was supposed to play out under the new rules.
Maybe the girls hadn't just been cover. Maybe Bikini Saturday was a thing too, one of the crazy parts of this crazy thing that Cody still couldn't wrap his head around. Maybe Nick expected weekends off; hell, maybe the whole week had been an experiment and now it was done.
Cody didn't really think that was true -- he and Nick never had been good at platonic. Too much closeness, too much heat -- something had to burn when they were together. He recognized it and he knew Nick did, too. He hadn't known exactly what would happen when he'd invited Nick to live on the boat with him, but whatever it was, he'd known it would banish the aloneness, the silence, the ghosts.
Whatever they were, whatever they did, life was always better with Nick than without him. That had never been truer than the last week, and Cody knew Nick felt the same.
Cody stood, picked up his towel, and went below. He could work with Bikini Saturday. He could, he would, because the alternative hurt him in places he hadn't known could hurt.
Army habits died hard, and the bed they'd shared was neatly made. Cody trailed his fingers across the pillows, aware the sheets were fresh but allowing himself to imagine he could smell them still in the room -- come and sweat beneath the soft tang of Old Spice.
He was rummaging in their closet for Happy Hour clothes when the boat rocked, and voices alerted him to Nick's return. He listened, frowning, deciphering at least two feminine tones.
I don't want to do this, he acknowledged, fighting the cold, sick feeling doing its best to choke up his breathing and massacre his heart. He wanted Nick, and that was no surprise -- no surprise either that he didn't want to share.
Somehow, dropping the pretense eased his burden just a fraction. With the admission, his heart beat more strongly, his breath came easier. Quickly, he pulled on the white pants and pink polo he'd chosen, squared his shoulders and headed for the door.
Nick met him on the stairs, wearing a ghost of his usual smile and a strange wired look Cody associated with botched missions and body bags.
Cody plastered a fake smile on his own face, acutely aware of pony tails and giggles only feet away, and gripped Nick's arm. "Everything okay?"
"Mm." Nick's smile was a worse fake than Cody's and he wasn't even facing the girls.
Cody could feel himself choking up, feel the sick cold creeping, paralyzing as it rose in his chest, and he fought it off grimly. "Have fun on the beach?" he said, hearing the brittle edge in his own voice.
Nick looked past him toward their stateroom. "Orange Blossom still down there?" he asked in a low voice.
Cody blinked. He had no trouble recognizing the co-ed from the beach in Nick's cryptic description, and he stood tongue-tied for an instant, shocked at Nick's assumption.
"She gone already? You found another gear, big guy?" Nick was trying to sound teasing, but all Cody heard was misery.
Suddenly Cody was warm -- too warm, lightheaded with it as oxygen rushed back into his chest, into his blood, into his heart. He clung harder to Nick's arm. "I left her on the beach," he said clearly, not caring if the girls heard, nor what they made of it if they did. "I, um, wasn't in the mood for company, I guess."
"You weren't--" Nick's breath caught, and he stopped. "I thought -- "
Cody leaned into him for a brief, precious moment. "I thought," he said in a low voice, flicking a glance at the salon. "I thought, and I -- well, I came home."
Nick nodded, squeezed his shoulder, and found a real smile. "Told the girls we'd take 'em to Straightaway's for Happy Hour. You in?"
"Of course," Cody agreed, his own smile wider than it had any right to be at this strange double date. But Nick wanted the same thing he wanted, and Nick had hurt the same way he had hurt, and knowing that, Bikini Saturday paled into insignificance.
---
The best thing about taking Contessa girls to Happy Hour was that Mama Jo could be counted on to round up her straying flock before anybody started getting serious. Nick and Cody talked up their expected protest as Bambi and Tammy were marched off by the formidable skipper, but as soon as the women left the bar, they were on their own way home.
Cody only paused to lock the boat up, and even as he did so, he could feel Nick's hunger like a tangible thing. He wondered briefly if this time it would be rough, hurried, the way it had been overseas -- a quick taking, a need slaked -- but Nick pressed him down on the bed with urgent tenderness, in a hurry only to bring them together.
Once they were naked, wrapped in each other, it seemed to Cody that time ceased to exist. He could not have said how long Nick sucked him, or at what point a teasing finger found its way into his last secret place. He only knew he'd come harder than he ever had, and then he'd come a second time with Nick's finger still buried to the hilt inside him, while Nick's seed spilled into his eager mouth.
After, he held onto Nick like a drowning man, lips clamped shut on the words, the questions, the needs that wanted to spill out. He ached inside -- not from penetration, but from the lack of it, and that alone was enough to scare him silent. He wanted so much -- everything -- and he knew Nick wanted too, but it was too soon.
Or too late, Cody mused, tucking his head under Nick's chin. Maybe if they'd talked when it began, all those years ago, rifles resting at the mouth of the dugout and cursory fire zipping over their heads. Or in the MP's, when they'd more often slugged each other than fucked, but still they'd clung together.
Tears pricked softly at the corners of his eyes, and he let them come. Nick was everything he had, and if that was fucked up, Cody was okay with it. Just as long as he had Nick at his side, that was.
"What's wrong?" Nick said sharply, moving, untucking Cody and making him look up. "Are you crying? Did I hurt you?"
Cody shook his head no, and tried to cuddle back in. The ground rules included no talking, and he'd schooled himself for that. "It was just a fucked up day," he said by way of explanation.
"Yeah," Nick agreed, resisting Cody's attempts to hide his face again, "but if I made you cry in bed, that's a whole other ballgame, huh? C'mon, talk to me, baby."
Cody hesitated. Baby? "You didn't make me cry."
Nick stroked Cody's cheek. "Liar." He frowned a little, running one hand down Cody's back and giving his ass a gentle squeeze. "If it was what I was doing to ya -- " Nick punctuated his words with another squeeze, then moved his hand to Cody's hip " -- I didn't mean anything, you know? I mean," Nick hesitated, coloring. "I don't expect you to roll over for me, if that's what you're scared of."
Cody felt his own color rise. "Gimme credit for some self-respect. If I didn't like it, you'd have a black eye to prove it!"
Nick sat up, frown deepening, and drew his knees up to his chest. "Glad you said that," he said shortly. "First time I been sure all week that you do like it."
Cody propped himself on his elbow, staring at Nick. "If I didn't like it, would I have kept coming back?"
"Asked myself that." Nick shrugged. "But you know, a guy can like stuff when it's happening, and believe me, I know you been having a good time when it counts. What I don't know is what's going through your head when you wake up in the morning, and all damn day until I get back in my bunk again and wonder if you're gonna join me or not."
"You think I know any more than you? You never said a goddamn word, Nick, not one word so I knew what you wanted in all this."
"I never said a word?" Nick's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "How 'bout the part where you wanted to move to California, so I turned down a sweet chopper mechanic gig in Chicago and busted my ass haulin' cargo for a year, just so's we could be based in the same godforsaken town? Or the part where I dumped the cargo gig along with free room-and-board on the airfield because you wanted a half-shares roomie, and took up playin' tour guide because you figured harbor tours'd go better with an aerial option and an on-board chef?"
Cody sat up properly. "You said you'd rather fly than work on choppers all the time," he said lamely. "And you said yourself you were busting your ass on those cargo routes, I figured you agreed to come in with me because you wanted a rest."
Nick's frown relaxed, making way for a wry smile. "Here I thought I was bein' way too obvious, and you been buying my B.S. all this time."
Cody shrugged and looked away, feeling vulnerable. "You're the best friend I got. If I don't buy your B.S., who will?"
Nick's breath hitched. "It's a day for firsts, huh?"
"This ain't the first time I've bought your bull," Cody shot back, heart hammering. They were deep in unfamiliar territory now, and he wondered what the hell had happened to the talking embargo. He risked looking at Nick.
Nick reached out to him. "You're the best friend I got in the whole damn world. I didn't have you, I'd be ten years dead, and don't you ever think I don't know that, you know?"
Cody managed a nod and shifted across the bunk, closer to Nick. Close enough to duck beneath Nick's gaze, hide from the openness in his eyes. "Me too," he muttered, leaning in, muscles tight across his back where Nick's arm came to rest.
Nick leaned back against the pillows, pulling Cody to rest against his shoulder. He rubbed Cody's back gently but seemed content to watch the opposite wall.
Cody, aware he was being let off the hook, tucked his head down on Nick's shoulder. His best friend, his partner. The one guy he could turn to anywhere, anytime, and know without question Nick would come through. It had been that way since Vietnam, a few short weeks into their first assignment together. And neither of them had ever put it into words until tonight.
"Maybe we don't talk enough," Cody suggested quietly.
Nick snorted softly. "We don't talk at all, babe. Not about anything that matters."
Babe? The endearment warmed Cody from the inside out, made him braver. "You think we oughtta start?"
"Maybe." Nick sighed, tightening his arms around Cody. "Thought so today, when I looked up and you'd gone, and I figured you and Orange Tits -- you know."
Cody choked off a laugh. "Thought so too, when I told myself you were playing up to those girls because we have to -- only then I realized I didn't know, and maybe you wanted to, maybe we weren't -- " He stopped.
"Maybe we weren't what?" Nick asked softly. "C'mon, Cody, talk to me. It's time."
Cody took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. He thought of Nick's B.S. line, and the admission it had covered, and made himself speak. "Maybe we weren't as important to you as to me. I was so jealous it was making me sick, and I knew I couldn't feel that way."
"What way?" Nick asked, his tone gentle, his arms still tight. He lowered his head and nuzzled Cody's hair.
Cody reached up and touched skin -- Nick's neck, Nick's cheek. Nick pressed into the touch. "It's okay," Nick whispered. "It's okay, Cody, I gotcha."
Cody opened his eyes at that. His best friend, the one guy he could count on, the one guy he knew inside and out -- in this as in all else.
"Like you were mine," Cody said, lifting his head, looking up into Nick's eyes, unafraid this time.
"Moron," Nick said, grinning suddenly, and Cody grinned back. They reached for each other in the same moment.
The kiss was awkward at first, a battle, advance and retreat on uncertain ground. Then Nick's tongue caressed Cody's lip, as though asking permission, and as Cody welcomed him in, something gelled. No battle now -- strength on strength, heat blazing up and through, fire to consume them both.
Finally Cody understood. There was no master here, nor mastery -- none was needed. There was nothing to surrender save his heart, and that, if he was honest, had been given back in seventy-two.
Cody pulled back, still grinning. "I just wanna get one thing clear," he panted.
"Whazzat?" Nick leaned back against the wall, breathing hard, eyes devouring Cody.
Cody forgot what he was saying, caught up in watching Nick look at him. It was something he could definitely get used to.
"What?" Nick repeated.
"Oh!" Cody smiled. Being devoured was definitely in his future. He couldn't wait. "Um. Oh, yeah. Bikini Saturday is not a thing. You got that?"
"Bikini -- oh." Nick chuckled. "Depends who's wearing the bikini, you know?" He came off the wall slow, and Cody was unsurprised when he found himself borne down on to the bed and thoroughly kissed again.
"Orange isn't your color," Cody murmured in his ear, as Nick moved lower to bite at Cody's neck.
"Nah, but I could see you in pink," Nick murmured back, one hand sliding between Cody's legs. "Or what do they call it -- oh yeah." Nick raised up for an instant, grinned, then palmed Cody's balls. "Nude."
Cody moaned, both at the bad joke and at Nick's touch. "Give a guy a minute to reload, willya?"
"Long as you need," Nick promised, releasing Cody's balls. But his errant fingers crept onward, parting Cody's cheeks and finding the yielding center within.
Cody closed his eyes again, swallowing a second moan.
"Can I?" Nick whispered.
Cody nodded, pressing his cheek against Nick's. "Kiss me."
It felt good to be able to ask; Nick's mouth on his, hot and hungry, felt even better. Cody wriggled, rolling on to his side, slinging his knee over Nick's hip and moaning happily, loudly, as Nick took full advantage of the new position.
"You really like that, huh?" Nick murmured, and took another kiss, sweeter, softer.
Cody moved closer. His own cock was still soft -- after all, he'd come twice already -- but Nick's fingers were drawing out a different kind of pleasure, finding new places in Cody with every movement. "Yeah," he confirmed softly. "You're gonna let me do you too, right?"
Nick's breath caught. "You saying you're gonna let me -- " Nick kissed him, hard and hungry this time. "You don't have to, you know? Like I said, I wasn't expecting -- I mean, I wasn't trying to make you think you had to."
"You sayin' you don't want my cherry?" Cody teased, leaning into Nick and tightening his muscles on the intruding fingers at the same time.
Nick gave a strangled moan and attacked Cody's mouth. "You talk like that, I'll never last long enough," he muttered. "God, Cody. Really? You're really gonna let me?"
For answer, Cody grabbed the lube from the nightstand and pressed it into Nick's hand. He rolled onto his back, pulling free of Nick's fingers, drew one knee up, and reached for Nick's hardness.
"Now?" Nick's voice shook. "Are you trying to kill me, man?"
Cody hesitated, looking into Nick's eyes. "You don't want it?"
"I want you." Nick breathed deep. "You got no idea how bad I want you. But if I get it wrong -- if you change your mind -- "
"What's to get wrong?"
"I was too scared to kiss you in case I fucked up. In case I wanted too much, or my breath stunk, or hell, I wasn't good enough -- "
Cody started laughing. "You're good enough, okay? And maybe both of us are gonna get it wrong, but I got a promise for you, buddy. I ain't changing my mind. I want everything, Nick, everything you got, and I'm not waiting for it. Not anymore."
"Well, when you put it like that…" Nick's face relaxed into a grin and he climbed between Cody's spread legs.
***
It was awkward, and it hurt going in. Cody had done it with girls a time or two, and expected the pain, was ready for it. He expected pleasure too -- after all, Nick's finger had brought him to an unexpected orgasm, and thence to this point, spread out on his back, impaled on Nick's thick cock at his own request.
It was kind of scary, or it could have been if he'd allowed himself to dwell on it.
But there was no room for fear in him now -- no room for anything except a vital ecstasy, starting somewhere deep inside his spent balls or newly-awakened ass, clamping down on Nick's cock, owning it not as an intruder but as a welcome guest or perhaps a missing piece, a wandering prodigal found and restored.
Cody could feel his eyes rolling back in his head, his hips bucking to meet Nick's, his incoherent thoughts of guests and prodigals whirling haphazardly. He was seconds from coming, or maybe days -- time had no meaning, nothing had meaning save Nick thrusting deep into his core, joining them, finding his center and truly owning it at last.
Cody grabbed Nick's shoulders, closing his eyes and giving himself up.
"Open your eyes," Nick was saying with some urgency. "Cody, c'mon, man, are you with me?"
Cody couldn't think of a worse idea than opening his eyes (except moving or speaking), but he was with Nick, that was one incontrovertible truth, and so he did, albeit slowly and grudgingly. "Hmm?"
"Are you okay?" Nick kissed his forehead. Cody approved, and took the opportunity to close his eyes again. "Cody!"
Cody sighed and reopened his eyes. "We should sleep."
Nick, leaning over him, smiled. "In a minute, babe. I need to know you're okay."
"M'okay. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Remember? I -- I fucked you, Cody. I know I hurt you. I need to know how bad it is."
Cody blinked. "Bad? No." He grabbed Nick's hand and pulled until he encountered a stripe of semen on his own chest. "There. That's bad. I'm too old to come three times in three hours."
"Oh." Nick leaned down, lipped at Cody's hand, lapped at the stickiness, then placed a gentle kiss on Cody's lips. "Sure?"
"Sure." Cody closed his eyes again. "Hold me. Sleep."
"You got it, big guy." Nick lay down, curling up around Cody and wrapping him in his arms. "You can do me tomorrow, okay?"
"Might not have the energy." Cody pulled Nick's hand to his lips. "Might have to wait til Monday for that." He felt Nick tighten up behind him and pressed his ass back against Nick's groin. "Tomorrow you might just have to do me again."
"You -- you liked it?"
"Just told you I'm too old to come three times in three hours. But I did, didn't I?"
"Yeah, but -- " Nick broke off.
With a long-suffering sigh, Cody forced his wrung-out body to roll over so he could face Nick. "I'm kind of glad we get to talk now," he murmured, "but let's not overdo it, huh? You really want me to come right out and say I loved your cock up my ass?"
Nick flushed scarlet. "You don't haveta say that," he mumbled. "I don't even know how many times you pulled my ass out of the fire, you know? You're one of the toughest guys I know. And I -- you let me -- "
"We fucked," Cody interrupted softly. "You an' me, together. That's how it was. An' that's how it's gonna be, okay, pal? Us, together. You're in me, a part of me, and that's got nothing to do with what we did tonight. We got this way of showing it now, and it turns out it feels great. I aim to do it a lot more. You with me?"
Nick's color faded and he leaned forward, capturing Cody's mouth gently. "That's one thing you can count on. Whatever you dream up, wherever you're going, I'm with you, man."
Cody snuggled in close, tucking his head against Nick's shoulder and sinking back into exhaustion. "Just hold me," he muttered. "Be here with me now. That's all that matters."
The last thing Cody knew was Nick's arms settling around him, Nick's lips moving silently against his hair.
Rating: NC17
Summary: Cody didn't know what to expect when he invited Nick to move in with him, but whatever it was, he knew it wouldn't be boring...
It was hot on the beach. A perfect California day -- just enough breeze to make the heat bearable, the tide at half mast with soft blue waves, perfect for swimming, the sand baked the exact temperature for proper sunbathing.
Cody was trying to work on his tan, but there were distractions. First were the advances of a couple of out-of-state co-eds, and second was Nick, flirting with three of Mama Jo's girls in the shallows.
That was nearly enough to make Cody throw caution to the winds and encourage the bustier of the two co-eds -- accent from somewhere in the south, a bright orange bikini and a satisfactorily round ass -- but his body wouldn't have a bar of it, even in fun.
No matter how she pranced and giggled, Cody's eyes slid away from her luscious curves and stuck on Nick's broad shoulders. She wanted to cheer him up -- all he felt was the quickening of his own heart as Nick moved closer to Bambi.
Flirt with her, he told himself sternly. It's cover, that's why Nick's doing it.
But it was no use. He looked back at Nick instead, and the jealousy he'd been studiously ignoring all morning clocked him hard in the solar plexus, stealing his breath and effectively killing even his brain's interest in Miss Southern Comfort.
"Excuse me," he said shortly, jumping to his feet, grabbing his towel, and striding away toward the pier. He could feel the eyes of the two co-eds on him all down the beach, but those other eyes, the ones he wanted on him -- Cody didn't allow himself to turn to check, but he was sure they'd stayed right on Bambi's tits the whole time.
Cody marched back to the boat, showered off the salt and moved to the foredeck to get on with his interrupted tanning, sans distractions.
But while the sun was certainly compliant, pouring all the rays he could wish his way, and the pier was suitably deserted (or what passed for deserted in early June), Cody found his tanning lotion too thin, his towel too bunched, the shadows all wrong, and the breeze from the wrong direction.
And, to top it all off, he'd been back on the boat at least a half hour, and Nick still hadn't appeared.
There it was, the thing that had chased him off the beach. Cody sat up on his bunchy towel, drew up his knees and rested his head down on them. Things were crazy, this thing was crazy, and if he didn't watch it, he'd soon be crazy too.
A week ago, he and Nick had ended up in bed. It wasn't exactly, technically, the first time, but it was the first time when they weren't in the jungle or hours from a suicide mission or both, and that had to count for something.
In fact, it must have counted for something, because instead of an intermittent string of desperate handjobs, this new technical first time had resolved itself into a week of two men in one bunk, silent, cautious, but consistent. Every night, and every night they did a little more.
But they hadn't talked about it, and they hadn't kissed.
And now there was the beach, and the bikinis, and Nick's flirty smile.
Cody had absolutely no idea how he was supposed to feel, but he was damn sure it wasn't jealous and heartbroken. And he had absolutely no idea what was supposed to happen next, how Saturday night was supposed to play out under the new rules.
Maybe the girls hadn't just been cover. Maybe Bikini Saturday was a thing too, one of the crazy parts of this crazy thing that Cody still couldn't wrap his head around. Maybe Nick expected weekends off; hell, maybe the whole week had been an experiment and now it was done.
Cody didn't really think that was true -- he and Nick never had been good at platonic. Too much closeness, too much heat -- something had to burn when they were together. He recognized it and he knew Nick did, too. He hadn't known exactly what would happen when he'd invited Nick to live on the boat with him, but whatever it was, he'd known it would banish the aloneness, the silence, the ghosts.
Whatever they were, whatever they did, life was always better with Nick than without him. That had never been truer than the last week, and Cody knew Nick felt the same.
Cody stood, picked up his towel, and went below. He could work with Bikini Saturday. He could, he would, because the alternative hurt him in places he hadn't known could hurt.
Army habits died hard, and the bed they'd shared was neatly made. Cody trailed his fingers across the pillows, aware the sheets were fresh but allowing himself to imagine he could smell them still in the room -- come and sweat beneath the soft tang of Old Spice.
He was rummaging in their closet for Happy Hour clothes when the boat rocked, and voices alerted him to Nick's return. He listened, frowning, deciphering at least two feminine tones.
I don't want to do this, he acknowledged, fighting the cold, sick feeling doing its best to choke up his breathing and massacre his heart. He wanted Nick, and that was no surprise -- no surprise either that he didn't want to share.
Somehow, dropping the pretense eased his burden just a fraction. With the admission, his heart beat more strongly, his breath came easier. Quickly, he pulled on the white pants and pink polo he'd chosen, squared his shoulders and headed for the door.
Nick met him on the stairs, wearing a ghost of his usual smile and a strange wired look Cody associated with botched missions and body bags.
Cody plastered a fake smile on his own face, acutely aware of pony tails and giggles only feet away, and gripped Nick's arm. "Everything okay?"
"Mm." Nick's smile was a worse fake than Cody's and he wasn't even facing the girls.
Cody could feel himself choking up, feel the sick cold creeping, paralyzing as it rose in his chest, and he fought it off grimly. "Have fun on the beach?" he said, hearing the brittle edge in his own voice.
Nick looked past him toward their stateroom. "Orange Blossom still down there?" he asked in a low voice.
Cody blinked. He had no trouble recognizing the co-ed from the beach in Nick's cryptic description, and he stood tongue-tied for an instant, shocked at Nick's assumption.
"She gone already? You found another gear, big guy?" Nick was trying to sound teasing, but all Cody heard was misery.
Suddenly Cody was warm -- too warm, lightheaded with it as oxygen rushed back into his chest, into his blood, into his heart. He clung harder to Nick's arm. "I left her on the beach," he said clearly, not caring if the girls heard, nor what they made of it if they did. "I, um, wasn't in the mood for company, I guess."
"You weren't--" Nick's breath caught, and he stopped. "I thought -- "
Cody leaned into him for a brief, precious moment. "I thought," he said in a low voice, flicking a glance at the salon. "I thought, and I -- well, I came home."
Nick nodded, squeezed his shoulder, and found a real smile. "Told the girls we'd take 'em to Straightaway's for Happy Hour. You in?"
"Of course," Cody agreed, his own smile wider than it had any right to be at this strange double date. But Nick wanted the same thing he wanted, and Nick had hurt the same way he had hurt, and knowing that, Bikini Saturday paled into insignificance.
---
The best thing about taking Contessa girls to Happy Hour was that Mama Jo could be counted on to round up her straying flock before anybody started getting serious. Nick and Cody talked up their expected protest as Bambi and Tammy were marched off by the formidable skipper, but as soon as the women left the bar, they were on their own way home.
Cody only paused to lock the boat up, and even as he did so, he could feel Nick's hunger like a tangible thing. He wondered briefly if this time it would be rough, hurried, the way it had been overseas -- a quick taking, a need slaked -- but Nick pressed him down on the bed with urgent tenderness, in a hurry only to bring them together.
Once they were naked, wrapped in each other, it seemed to Cody that time ceased to exist. He could not have said how long Nick sucked him, or at what point a teasing finger found its way into his last secret place. He only knew he'd come harder than he ever had, and then he'd come a second time with Nick's finger still buried to the hilt inside him, while Nick's seed spilled into his eager mouth.
After, he held onto Nick like a drowning man, lips clamped shut on the words, the questions, the needs that wanted to spill out. He ached inside -- not from penetration, but from the lack of it, and that alone was enough to scare him silent. He wanted so much -- everything -- and he knew Nick wanted too, but it was too soon.
Or too late, Cody mused, tucking his head under Nick's chin. Maybe if they'd talked when it began, all those years ago, rifles resting at the mouth of the dugout and cursory fire zipping over their heads. Or in the MP's, when they'd more often slugged each other than fucked, but still they'd clung together.
Tears pricked softly at the corners of his eyes, and he let them come. Nick was everything he had, and if that was fucked up, Cody was okay with it. Just as long as he had Nick at his side, that was.
"What's wrong?" Nick said sharply, moving, untucking Cody and making him look up. "Are you crying? Did I hurt you?"
Cody shook his head no, and tried to cuddle back in. The ground rules included no talking, and he'd schooled himself for that. "It was just a fucked up day," he said by way of explanation.
"Yeah," Nick agreed, resisting Cody's attempts to hide his face again, "but if I made you cry in bed, that's a whole other ballgame, huh? C'mon, talk to me, baby."
Cody hesitated. Baby? "You didn't make me cry."
Nick stroked Cody's cheek. "Liar." He frowned a little, running one hand down Cody's back and giving his ass a gentle squeeze. "If it was what I was doing to ya -- " Nick punctuated his words with another squeeze, then moved his hand to Cody's hip " -- I didn't mean anything, you know? I mean," Nick hesitated, coloring. "I don't expect you to roll over for me, if that's what you're scared of."
Cody felt his own color rise. "Gimme credit for some self-respect. If I didn't like it, you'd have a black eye to prove it!"
Nick sat up, frown deepening, and drew his knees up to his chest. "Glad you said that," he said shortly. "First time I been sure all week that you do like it."
Cody propped himself on his elbow, staring at Nick. "If I didn't like it, would I have kept coming back?"
"Asked myself that." Nick shrugged. "But you know, a guy can like stuff when it's happening, and believe me, I know you been having a good time when it counts. What I don't know is what's going through your head when you wake up in the morning, and all damn day until I get back in my bunk again and wonder if you're gonna join me or not."
"You think I know any more than you? You never said a goddamn word, Nick, not one word so I knew what you wanted in all this."
"I never said a word?" Nick's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "How 'bout the part where you wanted to move to California, so I turned down a sweet chopper mechanic gig in Chicago and busted my ass haulin' cargo for a year, just so's we could be based in the same godforsaken town? Or the part where I dumped the cargo gig along with free room-and-board on the airfield because you wanted a half-shares roomie, and took up playin' tour guide because you figured harbor tours'd go better with an aerial option and an on-board chef?"
Cody sat up properly. "You said you'd rather fly than work on choppers all the time," he said lamely. "And you said yourself you were busting your ass on those cargo routes, I figured you agreed to come in with me because you wanted a rest."
Nick's frown relaxed, making way for a wry smile. "Here I thought I was bein' way too obvious, and you been buying my B.S. all this time."
Cody shrugged and looked away, feeling vulnerable. "You're the best friend I got. If I don't buy your B.S., who will?"
Nick's breath hitched. "It's a day for firsts, huh?"
"This ain't the first time I've bought your bull," Cody shot back, heart hammering. They were deep in unfamiliar territory now, and he wondered what the hell had happened to the talking embargo. He risked looking at Nick.
Nick reached out to him. "You're the best friend I got in the whole damn world. I didn't have you, I'd be ten years dead, and don't you ever think I don't know that, you know?"
Cody managed a nod and shifted across the bunk, closer to Nick. Close enough to duck beneath Nick's gaze, hide from the openness in his eyes. "Me too," he muttered, leaning in, muscles tight across his back where Nick's arm came to rest.
Nick leaned back against the pillows, pulling Cody to rest against his shoulder. He rubbed Cody's back gently but seemed content to watch the opposite wall.
Cody, aware he was being let off the hook, tucked his head down on Nick's shoulder. His best friend, his partner. The one guy he could turn to anywhere, anytime, and know without question Nick would come through. It had been that way since Vietnam, a few short weeks into their first assignment together. And neither of them had ever put it into words until tonight.
"Maybe we don't talk enough," Cody suggested quietly.
Nick snorted softly. "We don't talk at all, babe. Not about anything that matters."
Babe? The endearment warmed Cody from the inside out, made him braver. "You think we oughtta start?"
"Maybe." Nick sighed, tightening his arms around Cody. "Thought so today, when I looked up and you'd gone, and I figured you and Orange Tits -- you know."
Cody choked off a laugh. "Thought so too, when I told myself you were playing up to those girls because we have to -- only then I realized I didn't know, and maybe you wanted to, maybe we weren't -- " He stopped.
"Maybe we weren't what?" Nick asked softly. "C'mon, Cody, talk to me. It's time."
Cody took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. He thought of Nick's B.S. line, and the admission it had covered, and made himself speak. "Maybe we weren't as important to you as to me. I was so jealous it was making me sick, and I knew I couldn't feel that way."
"What way?" Nick asked, his tone gentle, his arms still tight. He lowered his head and nuzzled Cody's hair.
Cody reached up and touched skin -- Nick's neck, Nick's cheek. Nick pressed into the touch. "It's okay," Nick whispered. "It's okay, Cody, I gotcha."
Cody opened his eyes at that. His best friend, the one guy he could count on, the one guy he knew inside and out -- in this as in all else.
"Like you were mine," Cody said, lifting his head, looking up into Nick's eyes, unafraid this time.
"Moron," Nick said, grinning suddenly, and Cody grinned back. They reached for each other in the same moment.
The kiss was awkward at first, a battle, advance and retreat on uncertain ground. Then Nick's tongue caressed Cody's lip, as though asking permission, and as Cody welcomed him in, something gelled. No battle now -- strength on strength, heat blazing up and through, fire to consume them both.
Finally Cody understood. There was no master here, nor mastery -- none was needed. There was nothing to surrender save his heart, and that, if he was honest, had been given back in seventy-two.
Cody pulled back, still grinning. "I just wanna get one thing clear," he panted.
"Whazzat?" Nick leaned back against the wall, breathing hard, eyes devouring Cody.
Cody forgot what he was saying, caught up in watching Nick look at him. It was something he could definitely get used to.
"What?" Nick repeated.
"Oh!" Cody smiled. Being devoured was definitely in his future. He couldn't wait. "Um. Oh, yeah. Bikini Saturday is not a thing. You got that?"
"Bikini -- oh." Nick chuckled. "Depends who's wearing the bikini, you know?" He came off the wall slow, and Cody was unsurprised when he found himself borne down on to the bed and thoroughly kissed again.
"Orange isn't your color," Cody murmured in his ear, as Nick moved lower to bite at Cody's neck.
"Nah, but I could see you in pink," Nick murmured back, one hand sliding between Cody's legs. "Or what do they call it -- oh yeah." Nick raised up for an instant, grinned, then palmed Cody's balls. "Nude."
Cody moaned, both at the bad joke and at Nick's touch. "Give a guy a minute to reload, willya?"
"Long as you need," Nick promised, releasing Cody's balls. But his errant fingers crept onward, parting Cody's cheeks and finding the yielding center within.
Cody closed his eyes again, swallowing a second moan.
"Can I?" Nick whispered.
Cody nodded, pressing his cheek against Nick's. "Kiss me."
It felt good to be able to ask; Nick's mouth on his, hot and hungry, felt even better. Cody wriggled, rolling on to his side, slinging his knee over Nick's hip and moaning happily, loudly, as Nick took full advantage of the new position.
"You really like that, huh?" Nick murmured, and took another kiss, sweeter, softer.
Cody moved closer. His own cock was still soft -- after all, he'd come twice already -- but Nick's fingers were drawing out a different kind of pleasure, finding new places in Cody with every movement. "Yeah," he confirmed softly. "You're gonna let me do you too, right?"
Nick's breath caught. "You saying you're gonna let me -- " Nick kissed him, hard and hungry this time. "You don't have to, you know? Like I said, I wasn't expecting -- I mean, I wasn't trying to make you think you had to."
"You sayin' you don't want my cherry?" Cody teased, leaning into Nick and tightening his muscles on the intruding fingers at the same time.
Nick gave a strangled moan and attacked Cody's mouth. "You talk like that, I'll never last long enough," he muttered. "God, Cody. Really? You're really gonna let me?"
For answer, Cody grabbed the lube from the nightstand and pressed it into Nick's hand. He rolled onto his back, pulling free of Nick's fingers, drew one knee up, and reached for Nick's hardness.
"Now?" Nick's voice shook. "Are you trying to kill me, man?"
Cody hesitated, looking into Nick's eyes. "You don't want it?"
"I want you." Nick breathed deep. "You got no idea how bad I want you. But if I get it wrong -- if you change your mind -- "
"What's to get wrong?"
"I was too scared to kiss you in case I fucked up. In case I wanted too much, or my breath stunk, or hell, I wasn't good enough -- "
Cody started laughing. "You're good enough, okay? And maybe both of us are gonna get it wrong, but I got a promise for you, buddy. I ain't changing my mind. I want everything, Nick, everything you got, and I'm not waiting for it. Not anymore."
"Well, when you put it like that…" Nick's face relaxed into a grin and he climbed between Cody's spread legs.
***
It was awkward, and it hurt going in. Cody had done it with girls a time or two, and expected the pain, was ready for it. He expected pleasure too -- after all, Nick's finger had brought him to an unexpected orgasm, and thence to this point, spread out on his back, impaled on Nick's thick cock at his own request.
It was kind of scary, or it could have been if he'd allowed himself to dwell on it.
But there was no room for fear in him now -- no room for anything except a vital ecstasy, starting somewhere deep inside his spent balls or newly-awakened ass, clamping down on Nick's cock, owning it not as an intruder but as a welcome guest or perhaps a missing piece, a wandering prodigal found and restored.
Cody could feel his eyes rolling back in his head, his hips bucking to meet Nick's, his incoherent thoughts of guests and prodigals whirling haphazardly. He was seconds from coming, or maybe days -- time had no meaning, nothing had meaning save Nick thrusting deep into his core, joining them, finding his center and truly owning it at last.
Cody grabbed Nick's shoulders, closing his eyes and giving himself up.
"Open your eyes," Nick was saying with some urgency. "Cody, c'mon, man, are you with me?"
Cody couldn't think of a worse idea than opening his eyes (except moving or speaking), but he was with Nick, that was one incontrovertible truth, and so he did, albeit slowly and grudgingly. "Hmm?"
"Are you okay?" Nick kissed his forehead. Cody approved, and took the opportunity to close his eyes again. "Cody!"
Cody sighed and reopened his eyes. "We should sleep."
Nick, leaning over him, smiled. "In a minute, babe. I need to know you're okay."
"M'okay. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Remember? I -- I fucked you, Cody. I know I hurt you. I need to know how bad it is."
Cody blinked. "Bad? No." He grabbed Nick's hand and pulled until he encountered a stripe of semen on his own chest. "There. That's bad. I'm too old to come three times in three hours."
"Oh." Nick leaned down, lipped at Cody's hand, lapped at the stickiness, then placed a gentle kiss on Cody's lips. "Sure?"
"Sure." Cody closed his eyes again. "Hold me. Sleep."
"You got it, big guy." Nick lay down, curling up around Cody and wrapping him in his arms. "You can do me tomorrow, okay?"
"Might not have the energy." Cody pulled Nick's hand to his lips. "Might have to wait til Monday for that." He felt Nick tighten up behind him and pressed his ass back against Nick's groin. "Tomorrow you might just have to do me again."
"You -- you liked it?"
"Just told you I'm too old to come three times in three hours. But I did, didn't I?"
"Yeah, but -- " Nick broke off.
With a long-suffering sigh, Cody forced his wrung-out body to roll over so he could face Nick. "I'm kind of glad we get to talk now," he murmured, "but let's not overdo it, huh? You really want me to come right out and say I loved your cock up my ass?"
Nick flushed scarlet. "You don't haveta say that," he mumbled. "I don't even know how many times you pulled my ass out of the fire, you know? You're one of the toughest guys I know. And I -- you let me -- "
"We fucked," Cody interrupted softly. "You an' me, together. That's how it was. An' that's how it's gonna be, okay, pal? Us, together. You're in me, a part of me, and that's got nothing to do with what we did tonight. We got this way of showing it now, and it turns out it feels great. I aim to do it a lot more. You with me?"
Nick's color faded and he leaned forward, capturing Cody's mouth gently. "That's one thing you can count on. Whatever you dream up, wherever you're going, I'm with you, man."
Cody snuggled in close, tucking his head against Nick's shoulder and sinking back into exhaustion. "Just hold me," he muttered. "Be here with me now. That's all that matters."
The last thing Cody knew was Nick's arms settling around him, Nick's lips moving silently against his hair.
